A Bull, A Spaz, Some Spider Monkeys and Ghosts went to a party...

This last weekend was full, to say the least. Underdawg and his boyfriend came up from San Diego for a visit. Since they are VERY hospitable everytime I go down to San Diego, I really thought the least I could do would be to put them up at my place and show them around. The problem here is both of them are functioning alcoholics, so all activities had to center around them getting drunk. After picking them up from SFO, we went back to my place where they began drinking (Underdawg emailed me to make sure I had bud-light and Vodka at my place), then I took them up to the Castro where we met Sven, his boyfriend and unfortunately, Spaz for an evening of bar-hopping. This was the first time Sven had met Underdawg and his boyfriend, and he made it clear the next day how he was at a loss as to why these guys were my friends. The fact is, Underdawg and I go way back, as they say. And though you'd never know it now, he was once a Falcon Pornstar and a great (sober) "Big Brother" to me at I time when I really needed it. And they are still very real, unpretentious and hospitable "shirt of their backs" kind of people (although I was admitedly glad to put them on a train next morning so they could continue the next phase of their trip).

On to the next day, where Sven, his boyfriend and I had made plans to meet Red (who Sven has also boned...small gay world) at a house he and some friends were renting up at the Russian River. To my chagrin, Sven invited Spaz along...AGAIN. We took 2 cars from our rendezvous point in SF, and since Sven rode with me I explained to him that while I didn't find Spaz as abhorrently loathsome as maggots feasting on an open lesion, I didn't think he'd fit in to all types of social situations (basically anything not involving board games). To drive this point home, I told him how I specifically did NOT invite Underdawg and his boyfriend, since I couldn't vouche for their behavior at the places we were going, nor did I think they would mix well with those particular crowds. Sven is a very good and loyal friend, and I understand he was trying to help out his friend Spaz, who just went through a break-up, by keeping him company and occupied. But while we both agreed Sven is a "mega-mixer", I'm old school and prefer not to mix my vinegar and water friends in closed settings (bars, parks and other places you don't need an invitation are OK since it's up to someone else to throw them out if necessary).

Back to the Russian River party; when Sven and I arrived it was pretty low-key as this was also a very party-hearty crowd, so when we got there at 5pm, they were still slowly waking up and getting their second-wind so to speak. The house they rented was a mansion that they split up among 12 guys for the long weekend. I took off my shirt since this was the dress-code and, I told Red to give me a tour of the place. When we got into a room that was secluded enough, I wasted no time in pulling down his shorts (he was going commando) and massaging his pink hole. He didn't resist (I wouldn't have let him anyway) and just as I was about to bend him over for a fuck, a friend (hot 20-something guy) of his walked in on us. Now, this COULD have been one of those "bow-chicka-BOW-wow" moments, but when Red pulled up his shorts and said, "yeah, I think I'm not going to change out of my shorts just yet" I sensed an awkwardness to the situation, so I decided to play along. But this hot friend of his just kept making small conversation and apparently looked for excuses to stay in the room ("Um...have either of you seen a pair of sandals anywhere?") but FINALLY got the hint and left. I asked Red what that was about, and he said, "Oh, don't worry. He's just into whatever. If you told him directly to leave, he would have left. If you told him to get over here and suck your dick with me, he would have done that too." Fuck! I guess I was just too worried about losing my "bird in the hand" fuck with Red to see the signals. Oh well, I definitely took out my sexual frustration on Red's ass and pounded home a nice orgazm. Later that eve, everyone at the house, including one extremely obnoxiously loud, drunk chick who showed up (I distinctly thought this was going to be a sausage-fest, hold the tuna) decided to go to a local resort for awhile. I took this as my cue to exit for Bull's party. While I had a GREAT time with Sven and wished he would have come along, since he invited Spaz, I'm also grateful they all decided to stay.

Now, onto the next part of the journey; Bull's annual 4th of July party. Here's where things naturally got wild (but that was the point). When I got there, Bull was already creating a heavy haze with his inner-circle (eeesh, that really doesn't sound right). I chilled out in his bedroom with him and about 5 other guys as they smoked weed and injested a number of other alphabetical substances I just couldn't keep track of. "A" was there too; we'd been communicating via facebook, but hadn't seen each other in person since our "date" about a year ago. He told me he was up to 200lbs and lost about 15 of it but still felt overweight. When I saw him in person, I can say he is still probably 15lbs overweight, but as cute as I'd ever seen him. I tried to mask my dissapointment at watching him do drugs, and also tried to mask my persistent crush on him. But I also think I realized it would just never work between us for too many reasons to list. The really sad thing was later a couple walked in who were in their 40's (I'm thinking, don't know for sure), emaciated, shaved bald, hairless and pale bodies with obvious signs of advanced AIDS who after saying their hello's proceded to smoke crack. They sincerely reminded me of walking ghosts, and this is NOT what I want for A. But all I can really do is wish the boy well.

So, I figured that was a good time to leave the room, and after paying my respects to the host and participating in the seriously random and uninspired conversations (A is truly the odd man out in that regard as he is very intelligent, which makes it so much more of a waste) I headed out to the pool-party portion of the evening. When I arrived at the hot-tub, I noticed there were about 4 Spider-monkeys (lanky twinks strung out on whatever the fuck who were flayling and splashing around talking a mile and minute and thinking everything they said or heard was amazingly funny). I decided to hold-off until the human-to-spider-monkey ratio was more in my favor and came back 1/2 hour later after some light snacks (I hadn't eaten anything but ice-cream, coffee and beef jerky that whole day...more on that later). I noticed everyone was wearing trunks and said authoratively, "you guys are obviously unaware, but the house rules are no trunks after sun-down." One hot guy turned to me and before he could say, "Oh yeah? well whatabout-" I pulled down my trunks to let the long-ranger flop out and stepped in. Over the next few minutes, one by one the other hot-tubbers pulled off their trunks like giggly highschool kids.

I gave myself a good hour to pick out the guys I most wanted to fuck during this party, but as (un)luck would have it, the guys who I was most interested were progressively strung-out (I mean in an obnoxious chatty and jerky sense as opposed to being listless...which I can deal with) or in one case, total tops like me. I settled on a buffed black dude with a shaved head and fucked him over the sink in the bathroom (ah, that bathroom has seen quite a bit of action from me over the years). Unfortunately, the same incident that happened last time occured again; after I came and went back to the hot-tub the long-ranger was in total hibernation mode. And the SAME transexual (only I could have sworn it was a she-to-he; turns out it is a he to she, which definitely makes more sense) jumped in the hot-tub too, and started making the most cringe-worthy comments, including an awkward pass at me ("tonite would be extra special if someone would just take me. I'd prefer it were someone who wasn't drunk or on drugs..." meaning me, since I was the only one who fit this particular bill at that moment). So, my extra hard workout from the morning, my lack of food, the audio-wood-kill, coupled with the fact that I just finished boning were all factors in my inability to regain a stiffy. It made me wonder if skipping food for a couple of days and having a ripped body is worth it if you can't get an erection. But as I listened to conversations, pretty much everyone there who was getting any action was saying how they were on viagra/levitra/cialis (heated conversations ensued on which was best). So, although I swear to you, my good readers, that to date I have NEVER taken any such substance, I may consider it for the next party, just to level the playing field so to speak. Just sezzin'...

The rest of the weekend was definitely low-key. The occasional boning (averaging 2 a day from my regular harem) and home-maintenance/errands etc. No pictures to be had this post, but...damn! The ones from my last post should be good enough to last for a bit : )